Exploding Doorknobs
by Codename Jellybean
Summary: Hermione is convinced that Ron doesn't love her, while Ron thinks she's in love with a married Harry Potter.5 years after the war, not really epilogue compliant, will lead up to Ron proposing to Hermione. My first fic ever. (: T just to be safe. Includes exploding doorknobs, btw.WARNING includes absolutely no Dramione, but try it out anyway :)
1. Chapter 1

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**All right, so this book takes five years after the war. Harry and Cho are married and live in Diagon Alley. Luna lives in the building next to them and is dating Neville, who is currently out of this story and studying foreign Herbology in India. Percy is dead! Not the George! Yay!**

HERMIONE

Hermione could not finish her essay no matter how hard she tried. What else does he need to know about Enchanted Doorknobs you can't fit into four feet of parchment?, she wondered as she dotted all of her I's with hearts. After the war, Hermione had been at a loss of what to do, as with her excellent grades she could do anything she wanted. But when she had unknowingly signed up for an internship with Dorian Bannister, head of the Ministry Department of Law Enforcement through a questionnaire in Witch Weekly, she had come to find her "dream job".

But nobody cared about doorknobs, enchanted or not, when a certain Ronald Weasley was so much more intriguing. Absentmindedly, Hermione started sketching Ron on his broom. His long, lanky frame he had finally grown into, his golden Gryffindor robes that flew in the wind, like his red, fiery hair…..

"My god! I'm turning into…a girl!" Hermione softly exclaimed to herself. A dreaded girl, who obsessed over boys and clothes and all sorts of useless things that Hermione stayed away from. "Whatcha doing there, 'Mione?" Ron asked, as he sauntered inside the cottage, biting into an apple. Suddenly, she was all too aware of a sketch of a certain someone who was standing in front of her who would be immensely disgusted if he saw it!

Hurriedly, she covered the drawing of Ron with her arm and squeaked "Nothing." He leaned over her pile of books to read her essay. "Sorry to break it to you, but nobody cares about doorknobs. Why not do something fun, like what normal girls do, like, I dunno, crying about how ugly they look, or shopping?"

"Clearly you watch too much muggle television," Hermione said, crossing her arms, sketch in hand. "And this…this…infernal report is for that idiot of a man, Dorian Bannister!" Her cool response revealed nothing of her mind, which was processing all that Ron said on hyper mode. _Wait, so does he think I'm ugly, or beautiful? And when he said normal, was that in a good way or the bad way? Does he like normal? Am I normal? Omigod, I'm an ugly, abnormal, unlovable person!_

Clearly disinterested, Ron just said "Well, I'll leave you to it. Never thought I'd see the day that Miss Hermione Granger was having a hard time with schoolwork…" And with that, he dropped the apple core onto the floor and went into Ginny's room. Ginny, wanting to move out of the house, but still close to her parents, had built a small three room cottage for her to live in just on the other side of the apple tree.. Hermione had moved in, having nowhere to go.

RON

Walking into Ginny's room, Ron couldn't keep the disgust out of his mental voice. _What were you thinking, telling her that she was normal? She was so wonderfully unique and beautiful_…..Lost in the vision of Hermione Granger for a few seconds, his military mind snapped back_. You ruined it! What kind of bloke tells a girl that they should cry because they're ugly?_ Then his remorseful mind came in the game_. It doesn't matter anyways. I saw that picture of Harry wearing his Gryffindor Quidditch robes she was hiding from me, never mind that she was dating me…I'm a hopeless case. My best mate who is married with a son, for godsakes is being loved by my girlfriend…._

Harry apparated into Ginny's room, breathless, sweaty, and triumphantly holding a snitch. Just faintly, you could make out the words I OPEN AT THE CLOSE . "Just after you left, I found the snitch! I won! I Won!"

Ron couldn't keep the resignation out of his voice. "You were wrong, by the way. She doesn't love me. She loves you, and she's too nice to say it and break up with me. I even saw her picture of you playing Quidditch, and she was hiding it from me…" Harry frowned. But I've got Cho. Of course she loves you! You know our Hermione…she's hopeless at anything other than books. She just needs to know how to express her feelings."

Ron wryly chuckled. "When did you turn into Dear Abby, mate?" Noting Harry's mystified look, he explained. "Some Muggle newspaper advice girl. 'Mione's mum is American, you know, and 'Mione still reads American newspapers. "

Harry chuckled, and was about to Say something when a very irritated Cho Potter Apparated into the room, bawling baby on her hip. "Harry James Potter! I have called you three times and every single time, you haven't answered! I have to tell you something…" Harry warily asked "Yes…? Im sorry, babe."

Cho smiled. "I'm pregnant! Again!" Harry was confused, and Cho rolled her eyes. "I took a charm this morning. New baby, Harry. New child. Need I elaborate?" Harry erupted joyfully "New baby! We must celebrate! Ron, let's get drinks all 'round at Madam Rosemerta's. On you, of course. "

Ginny walked in, shocked at seeing three newcomers in her room. "Why is everybody in my room?" She asked arms akimbo. Cho and Harry and James quickly said goodbye and apparated to their flat in Diagon Alley, and Ginny kicked Ron ut of her room.

I'll never get Hermione…She's just too good for me. Ron thought sadly. In the cottage he had just left, a curly brown haired girl started writing Hermione R. Weasley on all of her papers.


	2. Hermione:Am I normal?

HERMIONE

Finally deciding that she would get no more work finished on her report tonight, with a huff of aggravation, Hermione Vanished the apple core that Ron had dropped on the floor. She still couldn't keep his words out of her mind, about him saying she wasn't normal. She'd decided that Ron thought that being abnormal was a bad thing.

Gathering her books and parchment, Hermione entered her room, which was next to Ginny's. It was half the size of her old room at her parents' place, but more her. Her mum had decorated her room in pinks and whites and sparkles until Hermione was fifteen. This room had a small window overlooking the creek that separated Lovegood land from Weasley land. Her cot was under it. To save space, Hermione had opted for a cot instead of a bed, but enlarged it with her wand at night to make enough room for herself. A closet was built into the wall, and had everything that Hermione needed, from clothes to books. Crookshanks slept under a table pushed against the wall, and she had decorated the room in red(for Gryffindor) and bronze (for Ravenclaw).

She opened the door to her closet and pulled out her pajamas, Ron's Gryffindor Quidditch t-shirt and a pair of shorts that had fit her since she was in the third year. They only covered an inch or so of her thighs now, she would have to get new ones. Pulling them on, she surveyed herself in the mirror she had placed on the door of the closet. "Comb your hair!" the mirror barked(it did so every time).

Was untamable hair normal? Was it good enough for Ron? What about her nose? Her ears? Her lack of freckles? Her torrent of doubt was interrupted by Ginny walking in the room holding two steaming cups of Butterbeer. "What's the matter?" Ginny asked. She knew Hermione well.

"Am I normal?" Hermione blurted the question out before she had a chance to rephrase it. "I mean, am I good enough for Ron?" Ginny set the Butterbeers on Hermione's table and rolled her eyes. "Ron is good enough for anyone, even Snape. He's too lucky to have you as his girlfriend and Harry as his best mate. He doesn't deserve it."

Hermione wasn't convinced. "But…I think I'm turning into a girl. Like…a girl girl like you and Luna." She didn't know how to say that she wanted to learn how to put on makeup and know what the most fashionable robes were, but Ginny guessed. "I'll lend you my lipstick and mascara, and teach you how to use it. I don't know what you see in him anyways."

Hermione sighed." His hair, his piercing blue eyes, his humor, his long, gentle fingers, hip lips…"Hermione continued dreamily until Ginny squealed disgustedly and hit her with a pillow.

So, what do you think? Hermione is a bit OOC as of now, but I thought that since having a major league crush was new to her, she might be acting a bit different than her normal self.


	3. Ron:The fake diary

**By the way, thanks to WingedPanther1 for my first review! :D I've read a story of yours, and it was really good, but it was when I didn't have an account, so I couldn't review. Anyways… (Btw, did you know that three …s is called an ellipsis?)Also, I suck at chapter names...go easy on me!:)**

The next day…

RON

One of the disadvantages to living at home with your parents was that there were constant chores to do. After a very long and tedious day of scrubbing cauldrons with Mum, Ron was ready to flop down on his bed and sleep. He opened the door to his room, which (other than a large poster of a swimsuit-clad girl hidden under a Chudley Cannons poster) had remained relatively unchanged.

Instead of the privacy he craved, he saw Harry Potter reading a book, sprawled on his bed, chuckling. "Harry, mate, "he groaned. "Please leave before I hex your bits off.'

Harry just chuckled. "A man diary, bloke? I thought it was beneath you." Ron moaned "You found out about it? And, it's a man journal. For manly things."

Harry smirked. "However manly you may be, you aren't romantic at all. Who else but you says watching Quidditch-at a friend's place, no less- is romantic?" Harry was famous throughout the Ministry for proposing to Cho by "accidentally" locking her in a vault at Gringotts and rescuing her on the back of a white dragon.

"So what do I do, then?" "For one thing, scrap the diary thing. " "It's a man journal!"

"Nobody cares about what you call your dairy! However, what if you leave out a…fake diary that shows you writing about how much you love Hermione?" Ron didn't see why Hermione would read someone else's diary, and he voiced that thought. "But she's a girl, and one who wants to find out everything. Of course she'll read it." Muttering Scribblifors with his wand, Harry turned a lint ball into a quill and ink, and summoned an unused notebook towards them.

"Now, then, what do you want to write?'

HERMIONE

(Same day)

"OW! Gin, I swear, I will poke my eyes out with this mascara wand!" Ginny rolled her eyes. They were sitting in Ginny's room in front of a vanity chest. The heart shaped mirror was making tsk tsking sounds as Hermione failed for the seventh time to apply mascara properly. "Just swish it, kind of, under one eye, and the other, like so." Ginny demonstrated and made it look effortless. Hermione tried and got black smears all over her eyelids. Finally, Ginny did it for her.

After doing relatively the same ritual(try, fail,try,fail,get Ginny to put it on) for lip gloss, eye shadow, and eyeliner, Hermione felt as if someone had caked her face in a very oily facemask. Ginny clapped her hands triumphantly as she gazed at her masterpiece. "Now next time, we can use foundation and blush, too!" Hermione sighed. Then, she gave a start.

"Gin, he's coming! Now!" From the window, she saw Harry-and, more importantly, Ron traipsing nearer and nearer the house. Ginny pushed her out of her room. "Hurry! Put on that cream sweater dress I forced you to buy. And that cloak-the brown and cream one that Luna forced you to buy. I'll stall them!"

Hermione didn't know what was wrong with Ginny. Why was she telling her to change in the middle of the day? However, with Ginny being the more experienced romantic, she did as she was told, and even took a few extra moments to drag a brush through her mane of hair.

"Looking sharp," her mirror told her, the first compliment it had ever given her. Hermione tried to look casual as she walked out of her room and into the main room. Near the cauldron was Harry, grinning uncharistically from ear to ear. Her sharp mind knew that something was different, when Ron was sitting on the breakfast table. For normal visits, he would sit in the green armchair(if Crookshanks wasn't occupying it). When he was tired, hed sprwl on the rug in front of the fireplace. After Quidditch, hed go directly to the small pantry t down a swig of Firewhisky.

He was holding a red notebook, one that looked like a book she might have used to take notes in at Muggle school, and tossing it back and forth. "Hey, 'Mione.' He said. As common for girlfriends and boyfriends, they kissed swiftly, him bending down and her on her tippy toes. It left both of them breathless, wanting more on th inside, and nonachalant on the outside. What were they up to? Hermione wondered.


	4. Hermione:The Kiss

**Ta da! Latest chapter update! So, this chapter starts a bit after the kiss. So…there's not much else to talk about. Who should Ginny date? I'm thinking Fleur, Malfoy (even though I hate Drinny with a blinding passion) or another character?**

RON

The kiss, only a few seconds long, was the highlight of Ron's day. He loved the taste of her sweet lips, the feel of her slim hands on his back, and basically everything else about her. The short kiss was torturing his every thought. His mind knew how they fit- his hands on her shoulders, hers on his back, both of them slightly leaning into each other.

This time was different, though. Her lips…seemed…slimier. Not in a bad way, but in a good way, a soothing, relaxing way, almost. Slimier wasn't the word for it…but what was? He swiped his hand over his lips experimentally to see what had been on her lips. He couldn't tell. It smelled sweet, like strawberries.

HERMIONE

Hermione fought tears in her eyes. She blocked out Harry and Ginny's mindless chatter and could only focus on Ron. Sweet, funny, hungry Ron, whom she adored…who was wiping off her kiss. Did he really not like her that much? She needed time lone for herself. Abruptly, she stood up.

"Sorry, guys, but I just remembered that I have to Floo with Dorian Bannister in twenty minutes." She explained. Ron looked crestfallen. "In twenty minutes? Mione, you still have time to chat for a bit, don't you?" Harry asked a bit too loudly, winking at Ron. Being adept at everything she had tried, lying (while something Hermione didn't do very often) was something that she was very good at.

"I have to prepare some notes, and dress in some 'Ministry appropriate robes'. The man is a total prude," she explained. Mentally she assessed her lie. Not to abrupt? Check. Extra details? Check. Maintaining eye contact during the duration of the lie, but not excessively? Check. Partial truth? Check. She did have to Floo with him, but in the evening.

Ginny looked at her quizzically. With a quirk of her eyebrow, she asked whether she really meant for them to leave.

Hermione replied with a subtle nod that yes, she did want them to leave, and tilted her head, asking Ginny not to ask why she wanted them to.

Ginny smiled, meaning yes. Harry finished putting his dark brown cloak on, and Ron was already out the door. "See you later, 'Mione. " He said, and left.

RON

"Why did she want us to leave?" Ron asked. "Because she has a Floo from work, soon, mate." Harry said. Sometimes Ron thought Harry thought too much of his own mental capabilities and left Ron behind. Harry was a great best mate, but a bit flawed, as all humans were. As Ron must have been, seeing that Hermione loved Harry, and not him.

"Clearly she was lying, Ron said. They had been best mates with Hermione since the middle of first year and soon enough, Ron had figured that when Hermione clenched her jaw, she was lying. Then, he remembered something.. "Harry, we forgot the journal-the fake one we made-at their place! We need to go back to get it."

Harry just plucked an apple from the apple tree, murmured Aqua Eructo for a stream of water to wash the apple with, and bit into it. With his mouth full, he said "Ut yayr posht zhu eed ih" which Ron took to meaning 'But they're supposed to read it." But what would they think of it?


	5. Ron: The diary 2

**Ta da! Latest chapter update! So, this chapter starts a bit after the kiss. So…there's not much else to talk about. Who should Ginny date? I'm thinking Fleur, Malfoy (even though I hate Drinny with a blinding passion) or another character? Thanks to Wandering-Panther1 and asphodel95 for being the first to follow this story! Yay!**

RON

The kiss, only a few seconds long, was the highlight of Ron's day. He loved the taste of her sweet lips, the feel of her slim hands on his back, and basically everything else about her. The short kiss was torturing his every thought. His mind knew how they fit- his hands on her shoulders, hers on his back, both of them slightly leaning into each other.

This time was different, though. Her lips…seemed…slimier. Not in a bad way, but in a good way, a soothing, relaxing way, almost. Slimier wasn't the word for it…but what was? He swiped his hand over his lips experimentally to see what had been on her lips. He couldn't tell. It smelled sweet, like strawberries.

HERMIONE

Hermione fought tears in her eyes. She blocked out Harry and Ginny's mindless chatter and could only focus on Ron. Sweet, funny, hungry Ron, whom she adored…who was wiping off her kiss. Did he really not like her that much? She needed time lone for herself. Abruptly, she stood up.

"Sorry, guys, but I just remembered that I have to Floo with Dorian Bannister in twenty minutes." She explained. Ron looked crestfallen. "In twenty minutes? Mione, you still have time to chat for a bit, don't you?" Harry asked a bit too loudly, winking at Ron. Being adept at everything she had tried, lying (while something Hermione didn't do very often) was something that she was very good at.

"I have to prepare some notes, and dress in some 'Ministry appropriate robes'. The man is a total prude," she explained. Mentally she assessed her lie. Not to abrupt? Check. Extra details? Check. Maintaining eye contact during the duration of the lie, but not excessively? Check. Partial truth? Check. She did have to Floo with him, but in the evening.

Ginny looked at her quizzically. With a quirk of her eyebrow, she asked whether she really meant for them to leave.

Hermione replied with a subtle nod that yes, she did want them to leave, and tilted her head, asking Ginny not to ask why she wanted them to.

Ginny smiled, meaning yes. Harry finished putting his dark brown cloak on, and Ron was already out the door. "See you later, 'Mione. " He said, and left.

RON

"Why did she want us to leave?" Ron asked. "Because she has a Floo from work, soon, mate." Harry said. Sometimes Ron thought Harry thought too much of his own mental capabilities and left Ron behind. Harry was a great best mate, but a bit flawed, as all humans were. As Ron must have been, seeing that Hermione loved Harry, and not him.

"Clearly she was lying, Ron said. They had been best mates with Hermione since the middle of first year and soon enough, Ron had figured that when Hermione clenched her jaw, she was lying. Then, he remembered something.. "Harry, we forgot the journal-the fake one we made-at their place! We need to go back to get it."

Harry just plucked an apple from the apple tree, murmured Aqua Eructo for a stream of water to wash the apple with, and bit into it. With his mouth full, he said "Ut yayr posht zhu eed ih" which Ron took to meaning 'But they're supposed to read it." But what would they tink of it?

HERMIONE

About to tell Ginny why they needed to go, her eyes fell on the red notebook that Ron had been carrying with him. Usually, she respected everyone's right to privacy, and often backed up tht with many laws and decrees she had learned about in her internship. But there were some exceptions, such as today.

"I'll tell you, Gin, but first, let's read tis thing." She Summoned the book towards them, and it landed with a thud.

They opened it and began reading. The first few pages were random notes jotted down, scribbles and doodles in the margins. On the fourth page, Hermione began to read.

_So, I've decided to start a diary. Harry made me, but I kind of like the idea. Don't tell him, though. Today, I'm going to tell you about the most brilliantest girl there ever was. Her hair is amazing, soft, and not too perfect, and her eyes are dark pools of the best Honeydukes chocolate I've ever had. She was a hatstall inbetween Ravenclaw and Gryfindor, and the boldest girl I have ever known. I love her hands, her long slender elegant fingers and everything else about her. Too bad she loves someone else. What can I do to gain her hand?_

_-Ron_

Hermione felt her heart drop into her stomach. It was obvious. Ron loved Cho.

**So, I basically just needed an ending very quickly, as I'm in a rush. I promise I'll do better with endings from now on. And titles. (Exploding Doorknobs was the only thing I could think of)**


	6. Ron:Filler Chappy(read it!)

**Yay! Thanks to Sinistra Chant for following meJ. To Winged-panther 1, that's actually a great idea (I asked some of my fanfic friends whether I should or not, and they all liked it) but the only thing stopping me is my love of Charry. THEY ARE MEANT TO BE though I can see how Ginny and Cho would be great for each other as well. On with the story…**

RON

"So, do you think the diary idea worked?" Ron asked Harry uncomfortably. He hoped he had put enough details in there, but writing was never his strong point. He usually turned to Hermione for that, which he couldn't do right now.

"I'm probably basically absolutely sure," Harry said, writing feverishly with a quill, a smudge of in on his nose. They were in Ron's bedroom again after a sumptuous dinner in honor of Harry and Cho's new son/daughter. Cho had claimed to have "morning sickness" and had retreated to the bathroom. "Alright, now, snails or toads?"

He asked Ron.

"Toads." "Toads or toadstools?"

'Toadstools." "Toadstools or chairs"

"Toadstools."

"Got it." Harry rushed out of the room with a purpose, not bothering to say goodbye. Ron started to work on his book. Not a book he'd read voluntarily, but in training to be an Auror (which lasted seven years) he had quite a bit of homework.

_The Imperius Curse was added to the Unforgivable Curses shortly after Bilbo Gamgee testified against the Wizengamot in…_

"Aw, look at our little ickle Ronnikins reading." "Isn't it a precious sight?" "Adorable." Ron sighed. He knew the twins were going to drop by sometime this week, even though he wasn't fully happy with the idea. "Sod off, Fred, George."

"In case you haven't noticed, you're talking to your older brothers who have children and a steady income." Fred/George said, throwing something that hit the back of Ron's head squarely. "Roxxes was so excited to see Uncle Ron, but I'll just tell her that her uncle is studying." One of the twins said.

_17784 when the Imperius Curse was used in the American Revolution, resulting in…_

At that moment, Roxanne, or, Roxxes as everyone called her came skipping into the room. She was a bubbly, vivacious three year old who looked a lot like Angelina, Fred's wife. If you looked closely, you could see freckles on her cheeks. "Unk Ron!" She cried, throwing herself onto him. Ron usually enjoyed playing with his young niece, but he had procrastinated reading this chapter for two weeks now and needed to study.

"Roxxes, why don't you show Daddy and Uncle George the pile of gnome vomit we found that one time? It still hasn't gone away." Fred and George exchanged queasy glances with each other and scowled Well get you for this, behind their shoulders as they followed Roxxes.

_Great catastrophes that prolonged the war. I love Hermione and then Bilbo Gamgee and her brown eyes commit suicide, people said I'd die for Hermione because of the Imperius curse._

Wait, what?

**I'll add more on Hermione's point of view shortly, I just wanted to have a Segway chapter to introduce Roxxes and everyone's favorite set of twins and a bunch of other crucial thing to the plot. Love you all!**


	7. Hermione:Parcel

**So, a new chapter J Thanks to all of you who've read past the first chapter (I guess that since you're reading this, you got past the first chapter) also, thanks to Imjustthatclever12 for following me! Four followers! Yay! (To be honest, I thought that I wouldn't get any reviews *cough Winged-panter1 cough* much less any followers) Anyways, now to Hermione, undoubtedly the best character in the Golden Trio!**

Hermione couldn't believe herself. Not only was her boyfriend in love with a married woman, she was helping that woman throw up in a toilet. With a final retch, Cho got up and rinsed her mouth in the sink. She smiled weakly at Hermione and Ginny. "Thanks. God knows where Harry goes any time I feel like throwing up!"

Hermione grinned. Harry was always squeamish at anything bathroom related and "magically" disappeared anytime vomit was in the question, even if it was his wife. Ginny prattled on and on with Cho about some clothing shop Hermione didn't care about while Hermione enviously looked at Cho.

Look at her, married to the Boy Who Lived, with a son, and expecting another, and has a gorgeous, funny man secretly in love with her! Hermione knew why Ron liked Cho. She was breathtaking, with silky black hair and pale, ivory skin. She was wearing a simple blue robes with small threads of silver entwined, and a matching sapphire necklace Harry had given her.

Then the conversation had stopped, and Cho wa looking at Hermione expectantly, probably having just asked her a question. "Oh, I'm sorry, what did you say?" She asked Cho. "I asked where you got that stunning blouse." Cho asked, pointing to Hermione's lacy blouse with pearl buttons and lace trim. Hermione didn't know. Ginny had forced her into it for the party.

"Um, I forget at the moment. Somewhere along Diagon Alley." Hermione improvised. A half-lie, or as Hermione prefferes to call it, a half-truth. Harry came running down the stairs, kissed Cho quickly, and abruptly asked Hermione "Chicken or fish?" "Er…chicken?" Hermione asked. "OK, gotta go, see you, honey." He said t Cho. Cho shook her head. "Missing his own wife's babyshower, what more do you want in a man?" She asked, throwing her hands in the air. Hermione curiously asked" Why did you marry Harry anyways?"

They all curled up together on the Weasley's couch, as Cho said "Because he's a hopeless romantic. Because He's so dense, it's adorable. Because once he has his heart set on something, he wont give it up." Ms. Weasley, apparently overhearing that conversation while serving pumpkin juice, said to them "I married Arthur because he would just keep following me. Everywhere I went, he was like a second shadow. Then, when He proposed, he kind of grew on me."

Hermione sighed. That was so sweet, like something out of a romance novel. Ginny stood up, a stony look on her face, for some reason. "I don't feel like talking about boys anymore, why don't we go find Roxxes?"

Cho stood up to go with her, but Hermione shook her head no, and said "Sorry, I'd rather stay here and sit." Ginny and Cho left talking happily, and Hermione went back to her rueful thoughts.

Ron came down the stairs from his room, wearing a white button-down shirt (the buttons were in the wrong holes) and jeans (too short for him), his hand with the watch he'd gotten for his seventeenth birthday in his jeans pocket. Hermione sighed, and felt herself wanting to rebutton that shirt (though it looked amazing on him, anyways) and buy him a new pair of jeans (though these showed his butt off just fine). Hermione! She scolded herself. Stop thinking about your boyfriend's butt and start talking ot him, like a normal person.

She walked over to him, and he absentmindedly pat her head, mussing her untameable curls even more. "Have you seen Harry?" he asked, turning his head in order to get a glimpse of him. Hermione's over-analytical mind went into powermode.

He wants to go to Harry to find Cho, right? Or does he want to go to Harry to talk about Quidditch, because if he is, I'm not going there…but Cho likes Quidditch so she might be there…

In truth, Ron had asked Hermione that question because he didn't know where Harry was. That moment, the fireplace burst into green flames. Roxxes squealed and clapped her hands, and the twins laughed at the tray of food Angelina had dropped because of the surprise flames.

A hand with long fingers pushed a parcel through. It was flat and square, and in block letters it had HERMIONE JEAN GRANGER 167 OTTERY ST CATCHPOLE THE BURROW LIVING ROOM STAIRS. Ms. Weasley looked at the parcel that was lying in the charcoal of the fireplace and said, "Well then, Hermione, it's yours for the taking!"

Years of fighting evil had left Hermione suspicious of strange parcels, so she waved her wand to check for harmful spells before opening it with shaky fingers.

It was a wooden box, with the intricate carving saying that it was from Ron. This was so sweet! Giving her a gift and going through the trouble of making it seem "mysterious", too? She opened the box, which, she discovered, wasn't a box, but a book with a wooden covering. She opened the pages, but couldn't believe her eyes. Page after page were pictures of troll clubs, mucus, hairballs, rat teeth, and other disgusting things.

Maybe Ron found these things funny, or it was going to get better, or something. She continued flipping. The middle page bloomed into something three-dimensional. A black box that hummed the Gryfindor version of "Weasley is our king"

Then, on the final verse the box exploded, and toad slime, toadstools, and owl pellets flew at her, leaving a shell-shocked Hermione Granger dripping in toad slime.

**Sorry for leaving it there-and also, thanks to everyone who reads this! I know I've said this before, but you all rock, even if yu don't read this! Or if you don't make sense not a very much of a little bit of time, like me! And the chapters get better from now on, I promise. Just bear with me for now! Yay! Also, I'm starting a Z for Zachariah fanfic soon, and even though many people haven't read the book, this story can be read without having read Z previously. Tata for now! **


	8. Hermione:Firewhisky

**Wow! Over a thousand views! This is really great…(and for all of you who think I'm being sarcastic, I'm not) Also some things in this chapter sound "wrong" and pervy but that is not intended, so don't get your twisted minds in a fix! On…..with….the….story. **

RON

What was this? It said it was from him, but he'd never do anything like that…Harry. Those nonsensical questions were all Harry's way of finding out how to "win Hermione over". The idiot. How had Cho ever married him?

Hermione turned to him with a shocked expression on her pretty face. "Her..hermio…mione…" He stammered. Her eyes sparked with anger and a touch of hurt. "How could you? What was that? Some kind of sick joke?" She burst into tears and ran out of the room. Harry. The idiot.

Ron made off to follow Hermione, but Ginny gave him a look saying Don't You Dare, and followed her herself, flanked by Cho and Angelina. With a forced smile, said "Now then, who wants some drinks before we wrap up?" With a flick of his wand, Ron apparated into Harry's house.

Harry's flat was in Diagon Alley, overlooking Florean Fortescue's Icecream Parlor. It was Ron's third home-aside from the Burrow and Hogwarts. A small doorway opened into a large living room and kitchenette, with a walk-in pantry. A door off to the side led off to the bathroom and potionery, while a third door led to the bedroom.

Harry was lounging on the armchair in front of the fireplace with a huge grin on his face. "Well, then, mate. Did it go well?" Ron could do nothing but haul off and smack Harry's face as hard as he could. As Harry lay sprawled n the floor, Ron cast a Bogey hex on him. "Oy! That was out of line!" Harry shouted.

Wands forgotten, they wrestled on the floor, Ron kicking Harry while Harry pulled at his shirt, tearing it. When Ron had cooled down, and a Bogey-less Harry lay slumped against the wall, Harry asked "I'm guessing it didn't go well?" Ron just sighed. "What were you thinking?"

"Since every thought on your mind had Hermione in it, I thought that the questions I asked you would pertain to Mione's likes and dislikes. And the illustrations on the book had to do with our adventures at Hogwarts. Like the mucus looked like Crabbe's polyjuice potion in second year, and the hairballs were Crookshanks. Guess that didn't work out"Harry ruefully said, running a hand thrugh his hair. "Now what do I do?" Ron moaned. Harry grinned. "There has to be some potion we can make to fix this…"

HERMIONE

In Ginny's room, Hermione's tear-streaked face was smashed againsed Ginny's pillow. Cho soothingly stoked her back whil Angelina tried to comfort her. "Im sure Ron had good intentions." She said. Hermione just cried more. "Boys are such idiots. Fred actually got me a pair of hideously pink robes five sizes too big for me1'

Hermione turnd over and cried some more.

They had the best intentions, but they coldnt see that Hermione just wanted to be alone to wallow in self pity.

Ginny opened the door to her room, levitating a flask of Firewhisky behind her. "I thought since you were in such a bad mood, you needed something stronger to drink than Butterbeer," she said sympathetically to Hermione. The girls all shared knowing glances with eachother. Hermione had always insisted she would never cry for a boy-yet here she was, crying.

Cho tentatively aked Hermione "Please talk to us. Please? We're only trying to help you." Friends were so irritating- they were great fun until they wouldn't leave you alone. Ginny sat on the bed and poured out glasses of Firewhisky.

She handed one to Hermione, who sat bolt upright in the bed. "No. I am not drinking alchohol. Studies show that alchohol, especially in potent drinks, such as Firewhisky, damagis the frontal lobe of the brain, before the age of twenty-one. Not only that, but great quantity of such drinks may lead to nausea, fainting, hospitalization, or death. Also-"

Ginny rolled her eyes, and Angelina laughed. "We try to get you to talk and the first thing you tell us is about the dangers of drinking?' Cho smacked her, but Ginny continued what Angelina was going to say. "And you're twenty-two. That's older than twenty-one, and you're so smart it wouldn't hurt you to lose a few brain cells anyways."

Everybody drank but Cho, as she was pregnant. "It's just that…I thnk I actually love him. He's the best man and the only man in my life right now, and he just…humiliated me in front of all those people."

"Everyone thinks that at some point. And you've always helped me over all of the guys I liked." Ginny said. "And it feels good letting it all out, doesn't it?" Cho asked. "Thanks, guys. You are the best friends I could ever have!" Hermione said, still sad, but not by too much anymore. As the girls talked to eachother about how best to get revenge on Ron, Hermione took her first sip of Firewhisky.

It tasted bubbly and fizzy and wonderful.


	9. Hermione: Making Up

HERMIONE

"Miss Granger, this essay on Enchanted Doorknobs is inadequate," Dorian Bannister said sourly. "But sir, it is seven inches longer than nessecary, and I turned it in a day early!" Hermione protested to no avail. "It is too long…it should be seven inches shorter. When I tell you to do something, Miss Granger, follow it to every letter. Luckily the client needs this by tomorrow, so redo and revise it and turn it in by then," he said.

Hermione gave a huff of irritation, but just said "Yes sir, sorry sir," to the man and walked out of his office. Dorian Bannister was perfect. He wore perfect robes, charochal gray and a perfect, unscuffed watch (bronze, for Ravenclaw). His reports were not too short and not too long, like his gray hair. He had no debt, had never been in a run-in with the law, even for speeding on a broomstick, had a reasonable house in Godric's Hollow with a Healer wife and a Ravenclaw son.

"Why is Bannister so perfect?" Hermione muttered to herself, stashing her report she'd poured her blood, sweat, and tears into into her purse. She apparated out of the Ministry of Magic into the house she and Ginny shared. She had secretly started calling it the Hobbit-Hole, like from J. 's The Hobbit.

She grabbed an orange from the basket of fruit on the kitchen table, and sat down to revise her essay. She supposed she put 110% into everything she got because she was so competitive. She wasn't good at athletics, so she had to win at something-and that became academics.

An hour passed, and Hermione finished her new essay, and started to clean her room. "I think that I'm just acting this busy so I don't think about…Ron." She said to herself, then cursed herself for thinking about him.

How could he have done this to her? How could he have played some sort of sick joke on her for no apparent reason? How could he?

She completed cleaning her room, and started reading Romeo and Juliet for the thousandth time- in fourth year, she had crossed out Romeo's name and replaced it with Viktor Krum, and in fifth year she had rewritten scenes, rectifying Shakespeare's rhythm in the margins. It was like a diary of her teenage self, and a book. Sometimes she would still go back and cram in a few sentences of her day on the back pages.

Hermione lost herself in scene 8/ How Nice Viktor's Lips Look, fourth year, when a pecking at her window showed a small owl bouncing in the window, a scrap of parchment tied to its leg. Opening the window and giving the owl a treat, she unfurled the scrap of parchment.

_Abut last night I'm sorry_

_It was a mistake uncalled for_

_I'm really really stupid _

_And should be hit by a door?_

_(Sorry, I can't rhyme…and I love you, not Cho)_

_-Teaspoon Man_

As Crookshanks curled up in her lap, Hermione dipped her quill in ink and wrote back

One, I live right next to you, you could have walked

Two, it's true, you can't rhyme, and please never aim to do so again

Three, Teaspoon Man?

-Hermione

Pigwideon (Ron's owl) flew back the four or so yards inbetween their windows and soon came back with a

One, doesn't this seen more romantic? Atleast, Harry sys it is, though I don't take his word as seriously now, as it was his idea about the Floo Mishap

Two, this isn't helping my self-esteem at all, you know

Three, remember when in fifth year you told me I had the emotional range of a teaspoon after talking about Cho's problems?

-Scabby Lad

Hermione burst out laughing. This was the Ron she loved, and always would love. She would kill Harry the next time she saw him. She wrote back another reply, and spent the rest of the day exchanging notes with a special someone who took a spot near and dear to her heart

**So I'm beginning to love this story as if it is/was my baby, so I'm updating like, every day now. I'm also on this painting kick, and my paintings aren't half bad. SO, peace out until next time! **


	10. Ron: Nargle party

**So some doubts I've been having about this story is how they have an internship and stuff. For one thing, I've never had an internship with anyone and for another thing I REALLY don't know how magical internships work…so bear with me here, 'kay? This chapter is dedicated to Guest…? And RyanRow02 for reviewing J. I took a look at Ryan's profile and fully agree that ROMIONE is the best pairing … EVER and Dramione is horrible. The reason I put the word Dramione in there was for two reasons…one, because I wanted to see who would get the joke(hats off to Ryan) and two, when people search 'dramione' on fanfiction, instantly my non-dramione story pops up! Sneaky sneaky hehehe XD**

RON

Ron was elated at how well the apology notes had went. The practical, much-ignored side of him said that he could have just walked there, the houses were only separated by a tree, but the newly-sparked romantic side of him was glowing at how well this was all going.

Sometimes Ron though he had multiple personalities. Suddenly, the clock on his wall pinged, and Pig gave a startled hoot as Ron groaned.

To cover the expenses for the school he and Harry were studying to be Aurors at, he had taken a job at Florean Fortescues Icecream Parlor twice a week. Since he was part of the Golden Trio, getting accepted into the school was easy, and as he had taken part in the war, it was inevitable that he'd get a huge scholarship ( adding into it the poverty of his family and that he was best mates with Harry Potter the scholarship had doubled) but he still had to scrape a bit of money to make ends meet.

Apparating out of his room and into Diagon Alley, he arrived at the Icecream Parlor exactly three seconds late. However, unlike Hermione's boss, the git Dorian Bannister, Florean was lax and only cared if you didn't do your work with Decision, Deliberancy, and Decorum (the 3 D's, Florean called them-he'd made up Deliberancy)

Donning the bubble-gum pink robes, Ron set to work cooling different carts of icecream with his wand. The parlor dinged as Luna Lovegood walked in dreamily, with a quill and a scrap of parchment grasped loosely in her fingers. Luna came here most days, either writing letters to Neville or or working on her novel.

"Hey, Luna," he greeted her. "Mmmm. Today seems like a nice day for the Nargle Party for Ellelelaura, don't you think?" she asked him quite seriously. When asking Luna about her story, her answers were vague and mysterious, so Ron had absolutely no idea about what her question meant.

"Yeah, I rekon. The usual?" He asked. She nodded, so Ron gave her her usual pumpkin flavored icecream topped with blueberries. A few hours went by and nearing the end of his shift, Luna called out, "Oh, by the way, I'm almost done with my book and to celebrate, I'm inviting you over to my flat. Bring your family with you, and whatever Nargles you pick up, as this book was written in their favor."

Ron thanked her and she skipped out.

HERMIONE

After yet another day with Dorian Bannister, Hermione decided to visit her parents. She was very close to them, or as close as you can be, living in two separate worlds, and she dropped by whenever she could.

Filling Crookshank's food bowl before he left and writing a note to Ginny telling her where she was going, Hermione left. She took the Knight Bus over to the other side of the city and got off, feeling slightly queasy. She walked to her parent's house, which was a small house a typical nuclear family would live in, in a typical suburban neighborhood. She knocked on the door seven times, the way she always knocked so her parents knew that she was there

The dor opened, and there stood Jeann Granger with a large smile on her face. "Hermy! So nice of you to drop by! Daddy'll be home soon. How's the internship?" Jeann asked as Hermione stepped inside the warmly-lit room.

Jeann looked like the older version of Hermione with tame hair held in a bun. She wore a blue sweater over a pair of brown pants. A necklace Hermione had given to her in her fifth year was still on her neck, a dainty chain of light blue pearls.

"Just as depressing. We started a new case on Enchanted Doorknobs, and I swear, I am absolutely sick of doorknobs," Hermione sighed collapsing on a couch. Worry showed in her mother's big brown eyes, and Hermione hastened to reassure her.

"But Ron is wonderful," she said. Jeann smiled again. "Tell me about him while I whip you up some hot chocolate." And Hermione did just that, and continued inbetween sips of hot chocolate. "Mum…"she started, but it was too embarrassing to continue.

"What, Hermy?"

"Nothing. It's nothing."

"Hermione Jean Granger, are you keeping a secret from your very own mother?"

"Am I normal?" She asked in a tiny voice. Jeann was shocked. "Hermy, of course you're not normal!"

Wait, what? Looking at Hermione's stricken face, Jeann continued trying to smooth things over. "Is it because of Ron? Wait, of course it's because of Ron. Hermione, not being normal is a good thing. You're unique. You get excellent grades, yet still have more friends than I did when Iwas your age.

You have a sense of humor and can draw like nobody's business. And your beauty is unique too. How many girls can say they have elegant, long necks and slim hands that look like they come from angels, or hair that is a cinnamon brown that looks delicious?"

Hermione shrugged. She still wasn't sure. "Look, Hermy. I don't think you should change but if you want help, let's go shopping right now!"

Even though Hermione usually didn't like shopping, she consented anyways. She was desperate. She would shop for a million years if that meant being normal enough for Ron.


	11. Hermione: The note

**So, sup? I'm starting yet ANOTHER Tamora Pierce novel (I might do a fanfiction for her one day) and another Alistair Maclean novel (he was this murder mystery writer dude in the fifties. Way better than Agatha Christie. WAY BETTER)**

RON

Luna's party was excruciatingly long and tedious. Most of the people there were Luna's friends, not his, and Harry had pulled another disappearing act. The bright yellow robes Hermione had forced him into was itchy around his collar, yet she hadn't shown up yet.

Luna's flat, next to Harry's, was built like Harry's, but her décor, was much different. Pictures covered every wall, some hand-drawn, some of friends and family, both Muggle and moving. Over plush chairs were thrown everywhere and stacks of books were haphazardly everywhere, reaching up until the ceiling.

Ginny materialized next to him, a copy of Luna's novel in her hand. "Mingle!" she cried, pushing him. "Honestly, you are a disappointment to the entire branch of Weasleys. Which is to say, half of the wizarding world."

"Where's Hermione?" he asked her, tugging her hair as revenge for the push. Her robes were fluorescent blue, which strangely went Ginny informed him disdainfully. "I am the worst boyfriend ever," he groaned into the palm of his hand. "Yes, you are. Now find her before she murders somebody!" Ginny said, and pushed him again.

HERMIONE

Where was he? Where was he? Luna drifted by her, talking to Cho and Harry about something. Cho turned to Hermione, silently asking if she wanted to join them, but Hermione shook her head and mouthed later.

How was she supposed to talk to friends when RON wasn't here? She reviewed her plan another time in her head. Slip note that invited Ron for a date into yellow robes. Make Ron wear robes. Check. Now all he had to do was…wear the robes. Hermione realized with a wave of cold fear. OF COURSE he wasn't going to find the notes in the death-trap-landfill-place-of-doom-piece-of-cloth he called a pocket. Which meant….she had to ask him to his face.

"Great," she muttered to herself. "Just great." That is, she would have to ask him to his face _if he ever came._ But the next nanosecond, there came Ron, jogging to her, dodging the random people and accidentally knocking down a picture frame with his big hands.

His red hair was tousled and attractive. (Hermione would never ever call a guy hot or cute. She had signed that self-made contract in fourth year). "Hermione, I'm sorry. I thought you weren't here yet and…" Ron said, tumbling over his words in haste to apologise.

"Search your pockets," she said, unable to hide a race of irritation in her voice. With much bewilderation, he did so, tossing out a hlf eaten Pumpkin Pasty, an assortment of napkins, and a Sneakoscope, among other things. Finally, at the depths of his pockets, he found her note.

_Hermione Jean Granger cordially invites Ron Bilius Weasley to Madame Puddifoots Tea Parlor on the seventh of June at precisely 7:07 pm. 333_

He read it slowly, and when he was finished, carefully smoothed it out before stowing it in one of his pockets again. "Sure, I'll go out with you. Couldn't you just say that?" He asked, embracing her. He was warm and soft and an amazing kisser- the best way to end a party.

**Summary of this chapter: Hermione hides a note in Ron's robes to ask him out, which he doesn't find. When he does find it, he accepts and they kiss. See, this is why I didn't put the summary at the beginning of the chapter, because then nobody would have read it. (I am not the best at summaries) I NEED A BETA, so please, if you want to , pm me or however you say "Yes I do want to be a beta for Codename Jellybean"**


	12. Ron:the Date

**SQUEEE! Yay! I got FAVORITED! Thank you, Pottersgreed89, who also followed me, as did Beccax95 (you both rule) J Yay! I feel magical! **

RON

Ron's palms were drowning in sweat. Were his robes too tacky? What if he got stood up because she got cold feet? He wiped his hands on his robes. The cheap, tinkling music wafted through the shop as cherubs floated above his head. He jiggled his foot impatiently. His body was too tall for the small white chair nd table he was sitting at. Where was Hermione?

In a few minutes more of worrying, Hermione was there, looking unbelievably gorgeous. How could he have ever told her that she wasn't beautiful? She wore an orange cloak that was over a crisp white blouse and blue jeans, an her soft, curly, amber and coppery hair shone today. "Hermione," he said, getting up.

He fell, tripping over the small chair. Other couples looked at him as, from the floor, he said "Nice to meet you."

HERMIONE

Nice to meet you? What could she say to that? She couldn't giggle at his current position on the floor, or say her usual sort of "Fine-Ron-and-did-you-finish-your-work-or-do-I-hav e-to-do-it-for-you" she usually gave him.

BE NORMAL. That was what he had said to her. So she wore an outfit that Ginny and Cho picked out for her with makeup that felt as if she had a mask of oil coating her skin. She left behind her current novel she was reading, to her chagrin. She missed eating and reading at the same time, but, as Cho had informed her, that wasn't normal. Especially on a date.

"Hi, Ron. I missed you!" she squealed, ating very much like Ginny with most of her boyfriends. "Ummm…didn't we meet yesterday?" He asked, getting up off the ground. "But…I still missed you! You're my boyfriend, I'm supposed to miss you. Right?"

Ugh, she was such an idiot. Asking him how she was supposed to act around him? "Er, right. I guess." He replied. She sat down on the other white chair. The table was covered with confetti a particularly fat cherub was throwing as of now. They both opened up their respective menus.

_Ugh, how come nothing's healthy on this menu? All cakes and sweet drinks and things. If anything, they could have gone for Indian sweets or Japanese deserts. No, wait, what would a regular girl want? Oh, yes. A soda and…let's see…a cookie with pink sprinkles. How am I going to drink a soda with lipstick? Will I consume it? What happens if you consume lipstick?_

She told her order to Madame Puddifoot as Ron looked at her with a strange look in his eyes. What was wrong? Too much eye-lining-paint stuff on her eyelids? Was she wearing two different earrings? "What are you looking like that at me for?" she asked. "Er, umm, nothing. I guess. You look…pretty with your umm…jeans and things today."

Her boyfriend couldn't even give her a compliment or stop looking at her strangely. It seemed as if this date was going down the drain.


	13. Ron: Hermione bleeding

**Hey all! I know, it's been ages since I updated*sigh*. But I have a good reason : life. And the person I like stole my pen! (this is a good thing…)And also, te reason I am making their date so awkward is because let's be honest. An un-socialite, shyish, recently insecure girl is on a date with a bumbling, too-honest, awkward guy. There will be tension.**

RON

Hermione seemed different today. She was more retracted and fidgety than last time they had a date. Fear washed over him. Was this a date so that she could break up with him? No, Hermione wasn't that cold hearted. And they had been dating for three years! That was too long to go out and then break up…right?

Hermione smiled nervously at him, and he felt the need to strike up conversation. "So…how's your internship?" He asked her. "It's going…fine I guess. I turned in the exploding doorknobs report a few days ago and really liked it. And we won the case in the Wizengamot. , to tell you the truth, can be difficult to work with sometimes, though."

"Hermione, face it. The man has a broomstick up his-" What? You weren't supposed to insult your girlfriend's boss! What was he doing?

Thankfully, the food came then, deposited by a scarily happy cherub with a manical grin on its face. For a few minutes, the only noise inbetween them was the sound of eating. Hermione took a sip of soda gingerly-why?

She opened her mouth as if to say something when Ron noticed something dire about her. She was bleeding everywhere on her mouth. Blood trickled down her bottom lip and was faintly smeared across the top. Blood stained the bottle of the soda where her lips had been.

Panic and fear of Hermione's health leapt into Ron, and he abruptly leaned over and held her hand. "Hermione- you're bleeding everywhere! We have to get you to Saint Mungo's- quickly. Di-"

His voice died away as Hermione looked at him with sadness. "Is my lipstick really that bad, Ron? Am I really that ug-ugly?" her voice faltered as she sputtered out the last word.

"Lipstick? What? Is that what that blood is?" Ron asked incredulously, relieve that she wsnt bleeding.

"It must have smudged quite a bit," Hermione said, swiping a napkin along her lower lip to get the lip-stuff off.

"Since when do you wear lipstick?" Ron asked. It looked like so much work.

"Since I decided to look beautiful," Hermione said with a bit of uncertainity as she wiped the rest of her lipstick off.

What? "Hermione, for the smartest girl there exists in the world you are quite daft. You are already beautiful. I only date beautiful women," Ron said. He had to make her believe she was desirable.

"Ronald Weasley, stop making up lies to mollify me!" Hermione said, but blushed like mad. It seemed as if she was mollified, according to Ron.

Ah, now on to the favorite part of the date: the incredibly suave/macho/romantic thing that Ron would say and then the Kiss. "Will this mollify you enough?" Ron asked, before leaning over the table to give her a kiss, which she deepened.

His tongue wiped her lip and began exploring her mouth, before both of them realized that even fr Madame Puddifoots, they were too close.

**Eek! I haven't updated in a zillion days! I'm SO SORRY! I had computer issues. It looks like the next time I'll update is next week-ish. I've decided that Giny does get paired up with…a tall dark and handsome person! (Aren't I amazing at giving things away?)**

**Hobey ho and so we go…**


	14. Hermione: Marriage

**I got another favorite J la la la! And two followers J More singing! Thank you to RetroNick and HermiiLeinii for following and to HermiiLeinni for te favorite! And thanks to everyone who has reviewed, followed, favoritd, or even read the first chapter of my story! What do you guys think of a Scorpius/Rose fic? Or a Snape/Petunia fic? Or any other pairings? **

HERMIONE

"What I don't get is that you've been dating for three years and he still hasn't asked you out yet." Ginny said, wiping down the countertop at the kitchenette. Although she could do it with magic, she said that doing it the Muggle made it shinier.

"We're just taking things slowly. Besides, you're just a year younger than me and you're not married either!" Hermione protested.

"Yeah, but I just started dating Ella Bannister! And it's not like we can marry or even tell her father we're dating. He's such a prude and would disown her if he knew she was dating another girl,'Ginny said, starting to scourgify the dishes in the sink. Then she paused. 'Did I just say that out loud?' She asked slowly.

Hermione nodded. Ginny, who had dated virtually every boy in Hogwarts liked other girls? Ginny who gave amazing dating advice? Her best friend? What?

'It-it doesn't matter,' she said slowly. She had nothing against homosexual people, it was just that ... Ginny?

'Stop lying, hermione,' Ginny said. She looked down. 'You'll probably never talk to me about your love life again, or do anything wit me anymore. Or, if you do, it won't be the same. It'll be all stilted because I'm not normal.'

'GIN-nee!' Hermione protested. She took her friends hand. 'I won't lie, but it might be a bit awkward...at first. But I won't hate you. And I'll grow into it quickly. A lot of people like people of the same gender. You're just one more Regular person.'

Ginny smiled. She hugged Hermione. Then, realization set in.

Hermione groaned. "Ginny, are you dating MY BOSS' DAUGHTER? This is terrible!" she said, flinging a pillow halfheartedly across the room.

"Oh," Ginny said. "I never thought about that. But back to Ron not proposing…do you think he ever will?"

Would he? Hermione stifled her nervous thoughts and primly said "Of course he will. For some reason he says he's infatuated with me."

Ginny snorted. "He doesn't deserve you, plain and simple. He hasn't even asked you to marry him!" Clearly Ginny thought that meant something was wrong.

"Is that bad?" Hermione asked in a small voice. "I hate to say this but…most likely, yes."

RON

"Why haven't you proposed to her already?" Harry asked frustratedly as Ron spent too long describing Hermione's hair. It was amazing, with lustrous, soft curls that defied gravity and…"

"I dunno. Um… because it's scary?" Ron asked. Cho came in balancing James on one hip, and carrying a tray of pumpkin juice with her arm and her protruding belly.

"You should never ask this man about love, Ron," Cho said. "He doesn't even help his poor, pregnant wife carry beverages!" She said- but her voice was affectionate. Harry Levitated the tray to settle in front of Ron and him.

"Tell you what," Harry said. "When I'm done talking to Ron, we can go to any restraint your pregnant cravings desire."

Cho threw up her hands in desperation and said "He even makes fun of my cravings! Ketchup covered pumpkin pasties don't taste that terrible!" She retreated into the bedroom to put James to sleep.

"Just go for it, mate. I asked Cho the minute I got out of Hogwarts. And after I defeated Voldemort, broke up with Ginny, broke up with Daphne…" Harry said taking a sip of pumkin juice.

This was starting to seem like a good idea to Ron- Harry could convince you that Aragog was friendly if you paid attention to him. Pushing away that niggling seed of doubt, he said "Yeah! YEAH! I'll propose tomorrow…wait, make that day after tomorrow!"

"I have to get a ring," he explained to Harry.

Meanwhile, one curly-haired girl was in the process of brewing a love potion…

**This is the penultimate chapter! I've gotten so close to finishing! Next chapter : Guess. I'm thinking of an epilogue chapter if you all want me to. This is the only time I will ask you to review..but if you don't, don't feel guilty:) I almost never review stories either :)**


	15. Finale

**Ah, finally. The awaited Last Chapter. Where everything is resolved and the world is a better place. Hopefully. I've been on fanfiction for two months now, and I can say it has made me a better writer. For one thing, have you all noticed the beginning chapters of this story? All sporadic events that have no real importance, and sappy endings to each chapter. BUT here it is. The last chapter to my first fic. Thanks to everyone who read, reviewed, followed, and even hated it. Anyways, on with it then :)**

HERMIONE

'Where am I going to get Armadillo Bile in this season?' Hermione muttered to herself. She stood outside, brewing a Love Potion behind the apple tree. Her curly brown hair was a downright disastrous frizzy halo around her. Sweat stains coated her arms and back.

Ginny stuck her head out the window. 'Are you that desperate for my imbecile of a brother to marry you?' She called. Hermione gave a nod and turned back to the potions book. Ginny stuck her head back inside, continuing to attempt to bathe Crookshanks.

'Bile, bile, bile," Hermione muttered. The potion was a mucus yellow color; the bile would add the frothy pink color to it and finish the potion.

The cauldron started billowing clouds of red smoke. This was not good. This was terrible. Were she and Ron not supposed to be?

RON

'You can do it, mate,' Harry had whispered, clapping his hand on Ron's back. Cho nodded in agreement. Her eyes danced at the fact that one of her friends was finally getting married to her true love.

Ron opened the door to the Burrow and left without a backward glance. Instead of his regular shirt and jeans, he wore a black blazer and red shirt. A pair of itchy dress pants were on his entire body itched with nervousness.

What if she said no? They had only dated for three years and kissed one hundred and sixteen times...

He leapt over the random gnomes and unruly bushes, breathless to get to Hermione. A ring for marriage was pressed uncomfortably into his butt from being in his back pocket for too long.

Finally he reached Ginny's house. Red smoke poured out from behind it. Only the sound of Crookshanks' yowling was heard with Ginny's frequent cursing.

Where was Hermione? He tried the back of the house first. There she was...beautiful. Even more beautiful than before, with a cloud of fluffy hair around her and drops of dew beading on her forehead.

'Hermione!' He called. Was the too loud? Too abrupt?but she turned, with an expression of mixed joy and fear on her face.

'Ron!' She cried in a voice that wrenched his heart. 'Im not brewing a love po-' she began to say before stopping.

He didn't know whether he'd chicken out or not if he didn't say it now. He had say it now.

'so we've beendatinthreeyearsandiwaswonderingifyoudmarryme.. .' He said in a rush. Somehow, Hermione understood what he wa saying. Her face lit up in pure joy.

She ran to hug him, ignoring the cauldron that was overflowing yellow mucus stuff.

Something was missing, and he said that out loud.

'The ring, you idiot!' she scolded happily.

He dug in his back pocket for the ring. Luna and Harry had helped him choose it, but he had made the final decision. A silver band, plain and simple, with a giant yellow stone, so yellow it made your eyes hurt in the center.

She gave a gasp, either of astonishment or disgust, but Ron was too busy smelling her hair to care.

'You prat,' she said smacking him again. 'I had to endure MAKEUP and SHOPPING with my MOTHER and HUMILIATION for this, and you propose to me when I'm drenched in sweat wearing Ginny's pajamas?'

Ron laughed, full of euphoria. Their lips snuck out to meet each others Ginny threw a doorknob at them.

**So...should I include an epilogue? I want to. I had to include a doorknob in there somewhere, sorry. Any feedback? Check out my new fic, a SeverusxPetumia fic! Thanks:)**

**~Codename Jellybean**


	16. Epilogue

**I had to write an epilogue. I just had to. I really really had to.**

Platform 9 3/4 was chock full of smoke and children, owls and cats, and harried parents. One of said parents was Hermione Weasley. 'Rose, Huge, hurry up! You'll miss the train!'

Rose ran up to her, her face tear streaked. 'Hugo- he stole my diary. And now everybody knows I like Scorpius!' Hermione sighed. When would Hugo stop trying to embarrass his sister? 'Hugo!' She yelled. 'Get your butt over here!'

Ron hugged her with one arm. 'Now, now. You're not supposed to talk to children Ike that.' Hermione half heartedly swatted his neck. 'See how your mother abuses me?' He asked Hugo, who ran up just then.

'Hugo, apologize to Rose! You stole her diary and now everyone knows she likes Scorpius!' Hermione demanded. Hugo's confusion was apparent.

'I never took her diary,' he said as Harry, Cho and their children came up to them, suitcases it tow. 'You like Scorpius?' James asked incredulously. 'I thought you liked me.'

As Harry Potter's oldest, good looking, fifteen year old son, he was accustomed to 100% of the girl population (and quite a few guys) in love with him.

Lilly Luna, a year younger than 13 year old Rose, ran off to tell Scorpius the news. 'Oooooh! I'm telling!' She squealed excitedly. Rose burst into a fresh wave of tears.

Hermione wracked her brains on something to say that would soothe her daughter, but Ron botched it up even more. 'If you marry that spawn of Malfoy, I will disown you.' Rose sat down on the floor and cried some more. Cho sank down and tried to calm her down as Harry dragged Ron away to meet Luna, Neville, and their daughter Donna who was in James' year.

'Just board the train,' she told Hugo wearily. She kissed his cheek and hugged him until he squirmed. 'Ill write to you every week! Miss you! Eat your vegetables!' She called to him. He waved once and ran up to meet his friends.

Rose had finally calmed down when Ginny and Ella walked apparated next to them, Teddy in tow. Unable to have children with each other, they had adopted Teddy Lupin, moody sixteen year old, and fellow heart-throb and friend of James.

'Everyone says you like Scopius,' he told Rose. 'I thought you like me!'

Rose (again) burst into tears. Cho threw her hands up in the air. 'I give up!' She said wearily. Hermione pulled her daughter up and wiped her face with a handkerchief.

'If he finds out like him,' she said. 'Deny everything. Lie the heck out of it. Say it was a rumor, or that you were never at the Platform. Deny, ok?'

Rose's face lit up. 'Thanks, mom! You rule! Even if you're terrible at fashion, you're still the best mother ever! Except Jenny's mother lets her stay up until 11:00,' she added as an afterthought before hugging her waist.

'Teaching your children to lie, shame on you!' Ginny said. 'Today has just been so hectic!' Hermione replied, running her hands through her hair. 'Isn't September first always hectic?' Ginny asked good-naturedly.

Rose opened up her trunk. Just like hermione, she had to double check everything and make it all perfect.

'Ok, I have everything...robes...books...' Rose muttered rummaging through the trunk. Then, she stopped. A blue book with her careful cursive on it said 'Rose's diary...please keep out!'

Hermione sighed in exasperation as Cho and Ginny laughed.

'I couldn't find my diary...so I figured that Hugo...took it and...' Hermione sighed. For a Ravenclaw, Rose could be dense at times.

'Bye mom, gotta go!' Rose called grabbing her trunk. She kissed her mother on her cheek and waved goodbye to Ron, who was coming back with Harry.

Hermione sighed and Ron sighed with her. 'Kind of makes you feel you want to be their age, don't you?' She asked.

'No,' he said. He signed a child's piece of parchment. 'We're the Golden Trio. If we were their age, we wouldn't be famous and rich rich rich.'

Hermione smiled and autographed another parchment before waving to her children good bye.

**THE END...Thanks to itsMrsBlack for reviewing as well! And to my followers, reviewers, and favoriters! Hope to see you in another fanfiction soon! Hobey ho, and so we go!**

**(ok, that was a Pendragon reference in a Harry Potter fanfic, but give me some sLack. I'm crazy.)**


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